Wario Stadium

^Play music while reading. Replay if necessary.


So this is my first post and I don't see the purpose of some type of introduction considering this blog has zero significance. I figured it'd make sense to jump right into things and explain the meaning of Wario Stadium as the title of this blog. If you don't know what Wario Stadium is on a general level, I don't like you and never will. You are someone that lessens my faith in humanity. Fortunately the average American (and Jap) knows what Mario Kart 64 is as well as Wario Stadium -- my favorite/best course.

Wario Stadium is the best course for several reasons but the most important of them all is the fact that it is a course where skill stands out. Are items a good time? Of course. Are the shortcuts like the one in Koopa Troopa Beach fun? Absolutely. But what Mario Kart 64 all boils down to is who crosses the finish line first and Wario Stadium is where the best racers flourish. To further elaborate:

• It is a long track where fluke items won't blow a lead.
• Drifting, a staple of any good racer, is crucial for success at Wario Stadium.
• The one shortcut is far from easy. If you know which I am talking about and can execute it at a consistent rate, you are a good man. If you are a woman who can do this, let's just say my already low standards will fall through the floor all the way to Japan.

With Wario Stadium at the top of my list, here are the next four courses that round out my top 5:

2. D.K.'s Jungle Parkway... D.K. is the man and there's no better feeling than laying down bananas on the bridge, where making some spin out is the definition of a guarantee.

3. Koopa Troopa Beach... If I'm ever going to have sex on the beach, my first time has to be here. Hopefully I don't have any problems with the crabs!

4. Royal Raceway... Long track, again, where skilled racers excel. Good pavement as well. 

5. Mario Raceway... Great fucking pavement.

Worst course:

Kalimari Desert... Literally depresses me. Just look at it. And how the hell does Toad get a purple shell a) that early in the race and b) while he is in first place? Clearly shows the Nintendo folks did not give a shit when making this course.